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CBS News Segment

We wrote the book.
Actually, the better question is "where the heck have we been?!"
It would be easy to say that I've been on extended foreign assignment, building a clandestine, counter, counter revolutionary organization which is dedicated to overthrowing the despotic forces that threaten our loved ones with the chronic slovenliness of too much fast food, too much bad television and couches with too many lazy potatoes.
Like I said. It would be easy to say this. It just wouldn't be true.
Actually, the CLUE has been on sabbatical while we worked on some other cool stuff and now that they are done...we're baccccccck! And we're even cleverer, droller (is there such a word?) and dare I say...wittier than before.
While we were busy saving the world from the forces of evil, several monumental things happened. Madonna got divorced. I know...who in the world saw that one coming! Also, Google introduced a product called "Google's Mail Goggles" a program created to curb the tendency to email while under the influence. This program "uses the sobering properties of math to make people think twice before sending a martini-powered love declaration to a co-worker or passive-aggressive missive to a (probably obnoxious) relative." Are those guys at Google brilliant, or what?
Oh by the way, the economy tanked, we elected a new president and Dr. Gregory House continues to prove that a LOT of knowledge and a bad attitude can be a dangerous, albeit darkly humorous thing.
Meanwhile, the obesity epidemic among kids and adults got worse, not better.
What the heck is wrong with you people? I leave you alone for a few months and you get more overweight? More of you get Type II diabetes and chronic heart and liver problems! The physical education classes that actually might help with the problem gets less money and respect?
You can thank your luck stars that while all of the tumult has been occurring, the calm, steely-eyed professionals at GameBike and GamePad along with several dozen other organizations have been at work on solutions and products that will help us deal with this mess you've gotten us in. In the upcoming postings of the CLUE, we will get a look at some of the best ideas and smartest people who are working to make your health better.
As usual, we will also point out some of the dumbest, self-serving and silly ideas that masquerade as entertainment, nutrition and pop culture.
It's all right here folks. Check in every Thursday at noon for a new CLUE.
Later---
The Clue